AITA for not visiting my father in hospice because he threatened to remove me from his will unless I divorced my wife?

Oh, the complexities of family! Today we're diving into a heart-wrenching AITA submission that pits love against legacy, and loyalty against a dying wish. Our poster, a 35-year-old man, is facing an impossible choice from his estranged, ailing father. When a parent is in hospice, emotions run high, and expectations for reconciliation often overshadow long-standing issues. But what happens when the final 'wish' is an ultimatum designed to tear your life apart?

This isn't just about saying goodbye; it's about standing firm on your values when the world, or at least your family, seems to be collapsing around you. The pressure to make peace with a dying parent is immense, but what if that peace comes at an unbearable cost? Join us as we unpack this deeply emotional dilemma and try to figure out if our original poster is an asshole, or just a man caught between a rock and a very hard place.

"AITA for not visiting my father in hospice because he threatened to remove me from his will unless I divorced my wife?"

This situation is a truly agonizing test of character and loyalty. On one hand, you have the undeniable pull of a dying parent, the societal expectation to reconcile, and the very real human desire to say a final goodbye. Ignoring a dying parent, regardless of past grievances, can leave a lingering sense of regret and can easily be portrayed by others as cold or heartless, especially when an inheritance is involved.

However, the circumstances surrounding your father's demand transform a simple visit into an act of profound submission and betrayal. His ultimatum isn't a plea for reconciliation; it's a calculated, manipulative tactic to control your life and disparage your chosen partner. Demanding a divorce as a condition for inclusion in a will, particularly on his deathbed, is an extreme form of emotional abuse that weaponizes his impending death.

Your decision not to visit, therefore, isn't simply about abandoning your father. It's about protecting your wife, upholding the sanctity of your marriage, and maintaining your personal integrity. To comply would be to tacitly agree with his assessment of your wife and to compromise your most fundamental values. It would be a betrayal of the person you committed your life to, and likely poison your marriage.

The potential financial loss is substantial, and the accusations from family are undoubtedly painful. Yet, choosing your wife and your dignity in the face of such a cruel demand speaks volumes about your character. It’s a tragic situation where there is no easy answer, and any path chosen involves significant loss, whether it's financial, familial, or a loss of self-respect.

The Ultimate Test of Loyalty: What Would You Do?

The comments section for this one is going to be a battlefield, but I predict a strong leaning towards NTA. Many readers will immediately recognize the father's actions as a clear case of emotional manipulation, rather than a genuine desire for a final meeting. The sheer audacity of demanding a divorce from a deathbed will likely outrage most who value loyalty and respect in a marriage.

There will certainly be some who argue that 'he's your father' and 'you'll regret not saying goodbye,' emphasizing familial duty above all else. However, I believe the majority will highlight the importance of standing by your spouse and refusing to be blackmailed, especially when the demand is so egregious and disrespectful to your marriage. The consensus will likely be that some lines, even from a dying parent, simply cannot be crossed.

This AITA story serves as a stark reminder that even in death, some relationships remain incredibly complicated and painful. The original poster is navigating an impossible scenario, forced to choose between a dying father's cruel ultimatum and the integrity of his marriage. While the path he's chosen will undoubtedly bring continued familial strife and personal heartache, his resolve to protect his wife and uphold his values is commendable. Ultimately, he must live with his choices, and we can only wish him strength and peace in the face of such a profound and tragic dilemma.