AITA for telling my sister I won’t babysit her kids for free after she laughed about how “I had no priorities” when I was in university?
Welcome back to the blog, folks! Today we're diving into a family drama that perfectly encapsulates the long shadow past grievances can cast. Our Redditor is grappling with a classic sibling dilemma: a request for a favor from a sister who once dismissed their life choices. It's a tale of lingering resentment meeting present-day convenience, and it's bound to spark a heated debate.
The core issue here isn't just about babysitting; it's about respect, memory, and the unspoken expectations within family units. When boundaries are crossed or hurtful words are exchanged, do those scars ever truly heal, especially when a new need arises? Let's unpack the situation and see if our OP is justified in holding firm, or if family truly means forgiving and forgetting.

"AITA for telling my sister I won’t babysit her kids for free after she laughed about how “I had no priorities” when I was in university?"




This situation presents a classic dilemma of past hurts influencing present interactions within a family. On one hand, the original poster (OP) has a valid point about feeling disrespected and dismissed by their sister, Sarah, during a formative period of their life. Those words, especially about having "no priorities," clearly stung and have festered. It's understandable that OP would recall this when Sarah now expects free labor, essentially implying OP's time is still without value.
However, Sarah’s perspective, while not explicitly stated, can be inferred. She likely sees this as a simple family favor, and perhaps genuinely believes that as an aunt, OP *should* offer free childcare. She might have forgotten the exact wording or impact of her past comments, or perhaps she views her past remarks as playful teasing that OP is now blowing out of proportion. Her frustration stems from what she perceives as a sibling being unsupportive.
The involvement of the parents complicates things further. Their instinct to side with Sarah and advocate for "family helping family" without payment is common. They might see OP's insistence on payment and dredging up old history as unnecessarily divisive. From their viewpoint, family harmony might take precedence over individual grievances, urging OP to "be the bigger person" and let go of the past for the sake of their relationship.
Ultimately, this conflict highlights a breakdown in communication and a lack of mutual understanding. OP feels their time and past efforts were devalued, and Sarah feels entitled to free help. The core question isn't just about babysitting rates, but whether past wounds are fair game in present disputes, and if there's an unspoken expectation for family to provide services for free, regardless of prior disrespect or professional rates.
The Internet Weighs In: Is Family Obligated to Babysit for Free, or is Petty Revenge Sweet?
The comment section for this post was, as expected, a battleground! Many users immediately jumped to OP's defense, applauding their stance. The prevailing sentiment was that Sarah had disrespected OP's choices and time in the past, and now expecting free labor was the height of hypocrisy. Comments like "Play stupid games, win stupid prizes" were rampant, validating OP's decision to charge a professional rate and linking it directly to Sarah's past dismissiveness.
However, a minority argued that while Sarah's past comments were undoubtedly hurtful, bringing them up now for "revenge" wasn't the best way to handle family dynamics. These users suggested that while OP isn't obligated to babysit for free, using the past slight as leverage might escalate family tensions unnecessarily. They advised a more direct conversation about respect rather than an "I told you so" moment, urging OP to consider the long-term impact on the sibling relationship.






This AITA post truly highlighted the complexities of family expectations versus personal boundaries and past grievances. While many sided with OP, affirming their right to charge for their time and address past disrespect, a nuanced view acknowledged the potential for escalating conflict. Ultimately, the story serves as a powerful reminder that words have lasting impacts, and while family ties are strong, they don't automatically negate the need for respect, boundaries, and fair compensation for labor. Perhaps this exchange will open a much-needed dialogue between the sisters, albeit a painful one.