AITA for refusing to babysit again after my friend insisted I “watch her kids for fun” while she went to a concert?
Oh, the classic friend favor dilemma! We've all been there, right? A pal asks for a 'small' something, and suddenly you're neck-deep in a situation that feels anything but small. Today’s story brings us a familiar scenario involving childcare, which, as any parent or babysitter knows, is rarely a 'small' ask. The lines between friendly help and professional service can get incredibly blurry, leading to major friction.
It’s one thing to help a friend in a pinch, but what happens when that 'favor' comes with strings, or worse, with a dismissive attitude towards your time and effort? Our OP found themselves in just such a bind, and the question of whether 'fun' and 'free labor' can truly coexist in a friendship is front and center. Let's dive into this tale of concerts, kids, and questionable friendship ethics.

"AITA for refusing to babysit again after my friend insisted I “watch her kids for fun” while she went to a concert?"




This scenario highlights a common tension point in friendships: the unspoken rules around favors, especially when significant time and effort are involved. From Sarah’s perspective, she might genuinely see this as a casual request to a friend who likes her kids, possibly underestimating the true demands of childcare. She might believe that friends help each other out without expecting monetary compensation, especially for what she perceives as just 'a few hours'.
However, the OP's viewpoint is entirely valid. Babysitting, particularly for two young, energetic children for several hours, is a form of labor. It requires constant attention, problem-solving, and emotional regulation. To dismiss this as 'fun' or a 'playdate' is not only inaccurate but also diminishes the effort involved. The expectation that this significant work should be provided for free simply because of a friendship is where the core conflict lies.
A lack of clear communication from the outset often leads to these predicaments. While Sarah should have offered payment, the OP also could have established boundaries earlier or explicitly stated their expectations. The phrase 'watch the kids for fun' was a huge red flag that needed addressing. Both parties made assumptions about the nature of the 'favor,' leading to resentment and hurt feelings on both sides.
Ultimately, this isn't just about money; it's about respect for one another's time, energy, and labor. A friendship should ideally be built on mutual understanding and appreciation, not on one person inadvertently or intentionally exploiting another. Whether the OP is the 'A-hole' really depends on how one views the responsibilities and boundaries within close friendships. It’s a classic case of navigating expectations.
The Internet Weighs In: Is Friendship a Free Babysitting Service?
Well, the internet has spoken, and the consensus is overwhelmingly clear: OP is NTA! The comment section exploded with users echoing the sentiment that babysitting is a job, not a casual pastime, especially when it involves active children. Many commenters empathized with OP’s exhaustion and frustration, pointing out that Sarah's 'for fun' comment was not only naive but also disrespectful of OP's time and effort. It seems the collective experience strongly supports valuing labor.
Key themes emerged, including the concept of 'friendly favors' having limits and the importance of clear communication regarding expectations. Several users highlighted that true friends wouldn't put their friends in such an uncomfortable position or devalue their contribution. The idea that a friend would suggest free childcare for a concert night, without even offering to pay, struck a nerve with many who believe that basic respect involves fair compensation for services rendered.




So, there you have it. This story serves as a stark reminder that setting boundaries, even with friends, is not only acceptable but often necessary for maintaining healthy relationships. When a favor crosses into professional territory, especially with the emotional and physical demands of childcare, it’s crucial to communicate expectations clearly. Friendship thrives on mutual respect, and that includes respecting each other's time, energy, and the value of their labor. OP's decision, though causing temporary friction, was a stand for self-worth and a lesson in what true friendship should entail.